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Women's Guide

You mind be surprised to find out what your man does or doesn't find sexy. Men's taste in lingerie is not always obvious and what you might thing looks great on you, might not do very much for him.

Needless to say, what he thinks is red hot is also unlikely to be your first choice! You need to find a compromise which you feel comfortable in, but that he finds exciting.

Whilst men often default to the assumption that less is more in terms of fabric, it is generally the case that leaving a lot to the imagination is exciting. Also, the more you can see to start off with, the less of a tease it is, and the less progress you can make in the undressing.

You might be surprised if he likes more conservative things, but that's great for you as these are often more comfortable. Similarly you may be a little shocked if he prefers something you would consider trashy. Whatever you do, don't mock his taste, however bad it may be, because if he gets embarrassed by ridicule, he might never have the confidence to give an honest opinion again! If he remains silent due to worrying about offending you, then it doesn't help, because you'll default to wearing things that you like and he will feel there's no give-and-take.

You may struggle to find out what he likes at first. Most men will remain cautious about voicing an opinion about lingerie they see on a woman on television, for fear of offending you. You will probably find that if you make unsubtle enquiries about whether another woman looked good, then his answers will range from "not really" to "no" - with "not really" meaning "yes", and "no" meaning "I wouldn't say no!" Seriously though - bearing in mind he might be trying to give you the "right" answers, you may need to read between the lines. Don't fall into the old trap of mocking all women who are trying to look sexy in magazines or on TV! There's nothing more likely to shut a man up than remarking, "Gosh she must be cold" or "That looks so uncomfortable." Whilst the model in question may be both cold and uncomfortable, that isn't what he's thinking! By appearing practical and analytical, you might be closing the door on a conversation about what he'd find you sexy in, in the warmth and intimacy of your own bedroom.

If you're not sure, then the best way is simply to have a couple of trial purchases. Make a relatively conservative purchase. Something that you feel comfortable in and that he is unlikely to be shocked by. There's a strong chance he'll give you feedback unwittingly, and if he suggests you wear it again, then there's your answer.

One of the best ways to ensure you're both happy is to shop online together. You go first when looking at a web page, and shortlist a load of items you like. Try to be a little less conservative than you might automatically be, and this will give you an idea as to his tastes. Try to pick out a variety of styles and colours too, but make sure they're all things you would really wear. Then give this list over to him and see what he likes from it. That way you can't go wrong. No-one will end up being offended, because he will feel comfortable looking at your shortlist. Don't make him go first because he might pick something you think is tasteless, and as mentioned earlier, the more extreme your reaction, the less likely he is to offer his opinion in future!

Remember that men like to be teased, even if they don't realise it!